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GLEANINGS FROM THE GROVE
The Problem with Beanie Babies
Paul C. Fanning, DTM
I have crossed many borders and frontiers in Yes, indeed, the pen was mightier than the
my life—some actual manned border posts and sword-and a ticket is a ticket with the fine payable
others the imaginary line on the map. Growing to the State of California or Nevada.
up in Northern California, the most frequent On a more serious note, as an adult, I did
“border” I traveled across (and back) was the cross between Israel and Syria twice in the
border between California and Nevada. The 1990’s, and there were men with grim faces, no
border station or agricultural control post was sense of humor, and armed with semi-automatic
some twenty miles from the Nevada state line weapons coupled with a determined dislike of
on Interstate 80 by Truckee, a true “spot on the “the other side” who looked upon us tourists as
road” to the land of the ringing of slot machines, interlopers in the “peace” process. Flitting in and
the “Biggest Little City in the World,” and Verdi, out of England, Italy, Mexico, and Canada was
the site of the very first armed train robbery in a breeze, an easy practice until one fateful day.
the United States. Living in Alaska, and serving the whole state,
Each state wanted to control the numerous often involved driving (when I could, and if there
bugs and evasive species of plants that could were roads) with the need to get from western
innocently cross the line into the other state. Alaska to southeast Alaska by going through
This was a pain in the neck (and more) as at first Canada. These were the strangest borders I
they only had one lane that all vehicles stopped have ever crossed. If one was heading back to
at. And yes, our family’s first trip to Reno and Anchorage from Haines, you drove up to this
grocery shopping turned out to be a disaster as little kiosk about a mile out of Haines with a mere
we had bought oranges—those pesky round fruits red and white arm (then) Her Majesty’s Customs
that harbored so many beasties and nasty things officer (only one in the phone booth sized shack)
(which caused us to bid them a fond farewell would raise by hand. I did it so often that she even
as we officially entered California). That was recognized me! No border station on either side
eventually resolved by a “locals only” lane that of the Alaska lines, but about twenty miles from
allowed one to whiz through the checkpoint with the Alaska border was a very modern post, with
literally “the forbidden fruit.” Whilst the border rest rooms, parking, etc. And, of course, several
station did not have guard dogs and officers with excise and customs officers on duty as they
machine guns, they were suitably armed with checked you in on one side and checked you out
the most lethal weapon in their arsenal, always on the other and sent you on your merry way.
in their left-hand pocket. Happy motoring, eh! No RCMP Mounties there
28 ONE COMMUNITY