Page 16 - 2019 March Voices

ON THE PATH

That’s Not What a Mentor Does!!

James Wantz, DTM

“Do you know what a mentor does?” Ever notice that if you get bad information
“Yep! I’m great at it!” from someone who is supposed to know, you tend
“Oh really? Help me please! Someone in my to pass on the bad information as if you know
club asked me to be a mentor, and I don’t know what you are talking about? Like: mentors know

the first thing.” it all, or don’t question someone with a DTM, or
“Firstly, send them an email and tell them you are never turn away from your audience.
too busy to meet in person, so all your contacts will Yeah, bad information—all of it.

be via email.” Under the traditional program I thought
“Uh. . . I don’t think. . .” I knew what a mentor did. The Competent
“Second, tell them they are not supposed to talk Leader manual spelled it out for me: “mentor a
to you about mentoring at the club meeting. At all!” Toastmaster through their first three speeches.”
“But. . . .why?” That was easy! I told them how to do their

“Because mentoring only happens outside the club.” speeches (I have a background in theatre so—
“That’s stupid.” naturally—I am a good director, right?), I told
“Thirdly, send them an email listing what speeches them when to do their speeches, and I completed

they will do, how to do them, and when to do them. my Competent Leader project. I mentored the
Don’t let them weasel out of it. You’ve got to keep the stuffing out of that manual!!
pressure on. Point out all the errors you’ve seen in their There were problems though: one member
speeches. If you haven’t seen them speak, then make quit the club before giving his Icebreaker (I
some up. What do they know, they are new. That way was too pushy), another member couldn’t do

they will understand you are super knowledgeable my timetable because his wife had a baby (oh,
about mentoring.” come on, that’s the oldest excuse in the book),
“Wait! That’s not what a mentor does! I’m not and another member fled the country before

listening to you anymore!” finishing his speeches (ok, he was posted to
“Your loss.” American Samoa with the Coast Guard—same
Okay, not a REAL conversation, but every difference, sheesh). I had terrible mentees. . . or
single part of it was either said by me (or to me) so I thought at the time.
in a mentoring capacity. Yeah, as a mentor, I Fast forward several years. Two months into

suck—and I learned from some really sucky the Pathways rollout, I suddenly realized the
mentors also. problem was me. I was a bad mentor. I had just

16 ONE COMMUNITY