Page 16 - Voices Feb 2018

TERRY TALKS
Flying on Autopilot,
Ritualized Communication
Terry Beard
Robotic, ritualized speech/communication
patterns serve to create stilted, impersonal
dialogue at home, at work, and at play. So often
we meet up with friends, family and service
people in retail establishments who begin
dialogue with canned phrases like “How’s
your day going so far?” or “How are you?”, well
meaning but trite and semi-intrusive.
In the retail space, there seems to be a great
deal of disconnect about what constitutes a great
customer service experience, between the shop
clerks attitude towards the customer and an
attempt at good customer relations. Whether
we are in a coffee shop, talking with someone in
a call center or retail store, we need to bob and
weave through a gauntlet of behavior patterns
which sets us up to be on the receiving end of
an onslaught of ritualized communication.
We are in a civility service war, and many of
us are completely unaware of the fact that we
are on a battlefield being waged by the words we
Hey dude! Great! Fantastico!
Whuz up??
How’s it goin’?
Perfect!
16 ONE COMMUNITY
speak. The buyer-seller service war is driven by
ritualized communication, by poor customer
relations training, and the lack of civility from
the customers. The majority of us, when we
communicate too often, fly on automatic-pilot.
We do not stop to think about the words we
speak, their intonation, and the impact on
others. The shop clerks and the customers do
not pause to think about the impact of their
words. As a result, the war is spiraling down
the spirit levels of everyone’s expectations. Our
society is continually flying to lower altitudes
of appreciation and gratitude. All of which is
driven by all of us accepting lower levels of
communication standards and expectations
in our transactions.
For years I’ve started my day at the local
coffee shop. Upon arrival, when it becomes my
turn, I ask, “May I have a tall double-cupped
medium roast, please?” After placing my java
order, I observe and hear the cacophony of
commotion and attitude which creates the
ambiance for me and the queue of folks
waiting for their special drinks. As I wait
for my freshly-brewed java, I muster up the
courage to do mental martial arts with the
coffee shop staff, invariably, as a-time filler
between ordering my java and the time to exit
the shop. I wait, it will come, a question or two
about my personal life.
One must be on guard and prepared to have
their emotional temperature taken. “How is
your day going so far?” I respond, “Excellent.”