Page 28 - September 2020 Voices
P. 28

ON THE PATH








      Networking?




      Not My Cup of Tea!




       James Wantz, DTM







      Ok, full disclosure statement: I dislike  wall of shame. Networking is for extroverts. I am
      networking. Detest it. Loathe it. Flee from it. I’d  an introvert. I suspect networking (my version
      rather give a keynote speech in front of 4,000  of hell) for the extroverted is something akin
      people than get stuck with networking small talk.  to sitting in a quiet room while reading a good

      I’d rather live through a pandemic, wildfires, and  book with a lap cat (my version of heaven). Why
      hazardous air quality than network. And I might  does meeting people have to be sooooo difficult?
      be putting that lightly. My first networking event         Networking and dating are synonymous—we
      went exactly like this:                                 are attempting to convince the person in front of

          “You from around here?” I asked the lady  us that we are worth getting to know, intelligent,
      to my right after seeing that small talk was  funny, a good prospect, dependable, and not too
      expected.                                               hard on the eyes (despite the evidence right in
          “Yes, but not originally. You see I’m from. . .”   front of them). A few years ago a friend set me

          I was no longer listening. I was so relieved  up with a blind date. That has got to be the worst
      that my question was intelligible. I was breathing  type of networking event in the world (we aren’t
      easy for the first time since entering the room.  friends anymore).
      About a minute into her answer I started getting           I arrived early, got a table, bit all my nails

      anxious again. I had to come up with a second  off, and rose to greet the other person when he
      question. Ugh! Who knew talking to people  walked in the door.
      would be so difficult!                                     “Hi, I’m James. Wow! You don’t look anything
          She stopped talking, smiled, and looked at  like your picture.”

      me expectantly. I was sweating.                            “Um. . . yeah, neither do you. . .hmm.”
          I said the first thing that came to mind, “Uh—         I stuck out my hand for a more formal
      you from around here?”                                  greeting, and he finished his next sentence with
          She was no longer smiling. Face palm in the  the three most terrifying words in the world.

      extreme!                                                   “Handshake, pshaw! I’m a hugger.”
          I have a story like that for every networking          I shuddered.
      event (and date) I’ve ever been to. Pictures of me         So. . .let’s recap. I dislike networking, am
      at those events would constitute a very effective  introverted, and don’t like being touched. Enter




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